Overwhelming moments as Mum. It is real. It is freaking hard. This week has been extremely hard for me.. I am going to be very honest. I feel like shouting at the world – I have had too much! Go away and let me curl up in bed and sleep for a week! I feel like it has just been one thing after another. All piling up on each other and I am desperately trying to crawl my way back up from the bottom of the pile. I feel like my tiny voice is not being heard by my partner….that I need help…..have you felt this too? Do you feel you are last on the overwhelming long list? I swear sometimes social media only “highlights the best” of people’s lives and it can make us feel alone and like the only one feeling like we do. But we are not alone. Many of us feel the same way – but just have to open up a little.
I swear we do it to ourselves. We set our expectations too high, commit to too much, and attempt to juggle everything. Let the overwhelming feelings set in!
- the family
- the kids
- the household
- paid work commitments
- after school activities for kids.
- the social commitments
This all multiples and intensifies the more kids you have or any other commitments you may add to the list. I swear there must be something happening in the universe as I have talked to lots of Mums this week and it is the same feeling everywhere – all a bit overwhelming.
I feel like I am in a constant state of tiredness and just have to keep pushing through. My youngest toddler is the worst sleeper EVER. She wakes constantly at now 19 months old she still wakes every 1-2 hours every.single.night. It is exhausting. Then throw in one of the big kids having a nightmare, having growing pains, headaches, needing water, wanting cuddles from Mummy. I feel like it is never ending. I know people say enjoy these moments they soon will be grown. But it is soo overwhelming right now. I type this from a cafe as my house is like a bomb site and I don’t even know where to begin with cleaning it up. I am frustrated, exhausted and overwhelmed with how much multi tasking Mums have to do. And feel a lacking support from my partner to help…….But I need to reset my mind set.
My mottos in the past that have helped me through these times – calling my life my happy chaos – well this week sure has been chaotic however I am grateful – my kids are happy, singing and smiling. They are not sick. We have food to eat and money to do things. Sure my house is far from tidy and clean but with four little ones it is hard to “keep it clean!”
Remembering back when my eldest was a toddler and my twins were babies – three kids under 2…..life was a day to day struggle. Sometimes even just getting through hour by hour. I look back then and my life was a blur. My mottos in that time were BREATHE. If I find myself about to loose my sh*t at the kids lately – I am trying to catch myself and BREATHE. Count down from 5 and then trying to get the behaviour back on track. My twin 5 year olds are definitely PUSHING the boundaries so counting has become a regular occurrence. I saw a blog post this week that said kids are worst behaved for their Mums. I didn’t read it but I can guarantee it is true in our case.
Another motto that has helped me through the years of motherhood is “this too shall pass.” Everything is a stage and a phase and eventually things will change – you are just never sure when exactly. I hold onto the glimmer of hope that one day soon my toddler will sleep better. One day she will. Until then I need to ride it out, hoping for that night with a little bit more solid sleep or a couple of consecutive hours to make me feel that little bit refreshed. I also need to start focusing on simple 5 minutes of self care during the day to day times! Louise from More to Mum wrote this guest blog awhile ago for Darwin Family Life and I need to re-read it and take it on board.
I am also finding meditation at night is helping me unwind and get into a deep sleep – even if it is a broken disturbed sleep at least I am not tossing and turning for ages and it really is helping calm my mind and body. I highly recommend you looking into some apps or meditations on YouTube! Loving the honest guys on YouTube and they have heaps of meditations available.
At the end of the day this quote sums up everything perfectly. “Motherhood is a wonderful, rewarding, messy, noisy and sometimes crazy ride but it’s all worth it.” That is my current motto. If you can relate to this overwhelming feel and want to connect to other Mums – come and join us in the closed Facebook group the Darwin Family Life – Community Hub. Let’s all connect, share and pick each other up when we are feeling overwhelmed. I am sure if you chat to me next week – it will be a new week and everything chaotic will be back in balance.
Kids can totally sense our overwhelm sometimes! As I was dropping my kids off to daycare and school, one of my sons jumped in the car and handed me a red flower from the garden he had picked. “Mummy I love you. It is like a rose.” That was the sweetest moment to reset my day. May you find a moment in today to reset yourself too xx